Wow! Haven’t written a thing in many months, all the more reason to particpate in the artistry challenge. What a fabulous idea Robin! Thank you : )
sparse naked cold still
HE is HERE rest trust pray wait
His breath of LIFE comes
It’s summer and my time is my own, well, mostly. It’s been a while since I’ve blogged, well over two months. Perhaps I’ll pick it up again. This morning while writing in my beautiful pink “Love” journal (just got it at 50% of at B & N two days ago) I read the following scripture from:
Galatians 5:4
THE MESSAGE
“For everything we know about God’s Word is summed up in a single sentence: Love others as you love yourself. That’s an act of true freedom.”
The part that intrigues me is the fact that loving others as you love yourself is a fruit of freedom. Loving others as you love yourself is not
something that you practice as some practice self-denial. It is
like the water that sprays out of a fountain and refreshes all those it touches and the source of that fountain is the freedom that comes from living in the brain and heart knowledge that God loves and accepts me. I love listening to Christian music when I am working. (I’ve been painting and singing with BIG DADDY WEAVE and Chris Tomlin this week.) When I first awaken in the morning there is a refrain playing over and over in my head. Today I woke up to “You love me just the way I am.” That’s in a BIG DADDY WEAVE song. What a lovely way to wake up. My “I’ve got to try harder” personality bristles at this truth, but my heart embraces it. I have to keep telling myself, “This is true! Breathe it in and breathe it out. Let this truth be something that you chew on like gum or savor like chocolate. It feels selfish to focus on the fact that God loves me, like, what am I gonna do about it? Surely I have to have a response that PROVES that I am grateful for that kind of love. Then the pressure is on. But no! The pressure is not on! Relax…in the warm sunshine of this truth, bask in it, let it sink in till it permeates me through and through. Just BE!
So, as I go forth into a new day I am singing that happy refrain “God loves me just the way I am.” As I embrace Him and His love for me, I will leave the rest to Him.
Oh my goodness! Nearly two months since my last blog??? What’s with that??? I’ve been dying for the Spring to come and now it’s been around 90 degrees for three days and I’m wishing for SNOW!!! We don’t believe in turning on the air conditioner in April! Okay, well one of us doesn’t. ha! One of us works outside and wears a t shirt outside in a blizzard. The other…well, you know…the wimpy one, she (did I write SHE?) has a comfort zone of about 10 degrees. That zone would most like range between 62 and 72 degrees. That’s my fav. That’s why I’ve been dying for Spring and also very much enjoy the Autumn. I’m just hoping (and praying) that we’ll have a lovely Spring so that I can twirl around in the streets and look at all the beautiful budding trees and blossoming flowers.
Speaking of blossoming flowers…I painted my half bath a lovely shade of lime green (very light). I’ve been trying (mostly unsuccessfully) to copy a whimsical floral print from a piece of scrapbook paper I found at A.C. Moore. I can draw it freehand just fine, but the outlining (after I’ve painted in the design) is a real pain. To all my wonderful artist friends I say, “Man, you guys are talented! This painting stuff does not, I repeat, does not
come easily! It takes a looooonnnnnnggggg time and lots of attempts!” The best way to appreciate another person’s talent is to give what they do a try! I can be pretty patient if there’s a payoff at the end, but with this I’m not sure it’ll look all that good when I’m done, so I’m not sure how much time I want to give it. I’ve been practicing on paper bags that I painted the color of the wall but truth be told, it ain’t pretty : ( I think I need a paintbrush that is ultra fine for the outlining. The outlining is the part that is kinda nasty. When I’m done I’ll post some pics on facebook. Seems like every project I do takes f-o-r-e-v-e-r….
Great quote from THE PICTURE OF DORIAN GRAY by Oscar Wilde. I love it because it makes me think and think and think…Enjoy.
“Harry,” said Basil Hallward, looking him straight in the face, “every portrait that is painted with feeling is a portrait of the artist, not of the sitter. The sitter is merely the accident, the occasion. It is not he who is revealed by the painter; it is rather the painter who, on the coloured canvas, reveals himself. The reason I will not exhibit this picture is that I am afraid that I have shown in it the secret of my own soul.”
I keep thinking about Abraham and his faith…God spoke to him and he believed Him. The promise God made to him was not immediately realized, not even close. He waited years. Even though when God spoke to him initially in Genesis 12 the experience must have been profound, I have to wonder if after many years it would have been easy to just put that promise on the shelf somewhere and forget about it. Or perhaps he might have tried to figure out what he had misunderstood in that whole exchange. Genesis 12:7 says, “The LORD appeared to Abram and said, “To your offspring I will give this land.” After several years passed…I have to wonder if Abram was trying to figure out whether God had meant “offspring” in some sense other than the traditional. There were no children on the way. Sarai may have long given up by then. The desire for children is so strong, along with the emotions tied to that desire. Every month wondering, “would this be the month?” and then the disappointment each time. After a while Abram might have stopped mentioning the promise to Sarai. Why pick another fight with a hormonal woman?
Then, perhaps eight years later (the Thompson Chain Reference Bible suggests possible dates of 1921 BC for the initial Call of Abram and 1913 BC as a possible date for God’s Covenant with Abram) the LORD came to Abram in a vision and during that exchange (Genesis 15) 4″ the word of the LORD came to him. ‘This man [Eliezer of Damascus] will not be your heir, but a son coming from your own body will be your heir.’ 5 He took him outside and said, ‘Look up at the heavens and count the stars–if indeed you can count them.’ Then he said to him, ‘So shall your offspring be.’ 6 Abram believed the LORD, and he credited it to him as righteousness.”
Now, Abram was not perfect. He did agree to sleep with Hagar, at Sarai’s suggestion. Sometimes we women are just plain dumb! In those times this was not unusual. After Ishmael was born I have to wonder whether Abram felt that God’s promise to him was then fulfilled. At eighty-six years old, eleven years after the promise was given, Abram had an heir, a son from his own body. It would have been easy to assume he was the heir God had promised. During the years between Ishmael’s birth and Abram’s ninety-ninth birthday nothing more is said about the whole thing. Then the LORD again appears to Abram, this time confirming His covenant with him. He changes Abram’s name to Abraham and then Sarai’s to Sarah confirming that she will indeed bear a son to him. Abraham seems to have assumed Ishmael is the child of promise. He can’t help but laugh to himself at the thought of producing a child at ninety-nine years of age (not to mention what Sarah will be thinking when he tells her!) All that God instructs Abraham to do, he does immediately.
Not long after, the LORD appears again to Abraham near the great trees of Mamre and Sarah is allowed the opportunity to hear the promise for herself that she will bear a child . Perhaps God in His Sovereignty knew that she would have some trouble believing what Abraham had to say on this point. Sometimes we women are not entirely open to the plans God may reveal to our husbands. We wish we could have heard God speak for ourselves. God gave Sarah the opportunity to hear it for herself, and the very idea made her laugh.
All this background is here because I keep thinking about Romans 4:18-21. It comes to me over and over again.
18Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed…
19Without weakening in his faith, he faced the fact…
20Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God,
21being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised.
I keep thinking about this because I have my own things God wants me to trust Him about. In order to trust him I have to first acknowledge that I have these issues/circumstances going on in the first place. I can’t live in denial or hide myself away in reading, t.v. or eating. If I don’t acknowledge the challenges before me how will I be able to fully appreciate how God works through it? How will I be able to recognize that He did something big if I don’t first acknowledge in my own head that the challenge is formidable. Abraham looked at the facts of his situation…”I am ninety-nine years old and my wife is ninety and God is telling me that she will bear us a child before the year is out. Hmmmmmm. As far as reality goes, that is very, very unlikely…BUT, who has told me this? GOD HIMSELF. Well, the simple truth of the matter is that GOD can do whatever He wants. He has the ABILITY and He has the POWER. If GOD was not involved it would be impossible, but GOD is involved. Genesis 18:13,14 says,13 “The the LORD said to Abraham, ‘Why did Sarah laugh and say, ‘Will I really have a child, now that I am old?’ 14IS ANYTHING TOO HARD FOR THE LORD?…” When God says something it’s as good as done! Romans 4:17bcalls Him “the God who gives life to the dead and calls things that are not as though they were.”
When I face the facts of the situations of my life I want to do it like Abraham did, without weakening in my faith, without wavering in unbelief. I want these things to be an opportunity, an opportunity to invite God to do what He does best…take impossible situations and make of them something that reveals who He is! I can not do this, but He can. I want to stop trying to imagine the ways He might choose to work in a given situation and instead leave that situation to Him to figure out. I want to follow Him, focus on Him and delight in Him and trust Him. These are things I want to live out, not just think or talk about. I want to move forward empowered by God’s Spirit, for I know that He is my strength. Abraham is such an awesome example of faith. His example just spurs me on, it fans the flame of desire in my heart to trust God too.
Prayer:
Heavenly Father,
Thank you for the example of faith that Abraham leaves for us in Your Word. I can’t imagine waiting for all that time for a promise to be fulfilled and yet not wavering in my faith. Build into my heart and life that kind of steadfastness of spirit, steadfastness of trust in You. You have been so faithful to me throughout my life. Progressively You bring opportunities for me to trust You anew that You might reveal Yourself anew to me. I delight in the process of knowing You, I am always blown away by who You show Yourself to be. Thank you for never leaving or forsaking me.
Your Presence brings me so much joy! I love you <3
Amen
Hmmmm…been thinkin’. Been thinkin’ about my brain. Nearly finished the book MY STROKE OF INSIGHT by Jill Bolte Taylor, Ph.D. and I find it fascinating. She is a brain scientist who suffered a stroke and has recovered victoriously. She writes about her experience, of course, but also quite a bit about the differences in the way the left and right hemispheres of the brain function. I will write in the simplest terms…the right being the intuitive, picture side and the left being the logical, language side. Her story is so amazing, I won’t go into it here, get the book. What I’ve been thinking about is the way both sides of the brain connect and create balance. I’ve also been awakened to how some of my thoughts are more left brain oriented while some are more right brain oriented.
I just read a lovely quote that seems to connect both brains in such a delightful way. I must share it here.
“I wish I could take language And fold it like cool, moist rags. I would lay words on your forehead. I would wrap words on your wrists. ‘There, there,’ my words would say - Or something better. I would ask them to murmur, ‘Hush’ and ‘Shh, shhh, it’s all right.’ I would ask them to hold you all night. I wish I could take language And daub and soothe and cool Where fever blisters and burns, Where fever turns yourself against you. I wish I could take language And heal the words that were the wounds You have no names for.”
Julia Margaret Cameron (1815-1879)
As I read that quote I am intrigued by the author’s ability to communicate what she is feeling, what she is wishing. I like how she wants the words to perform actions, she wants to give them life…to breathe into them like God breathed life into Adam. I love that! She doesn’t want them imprisoned on a sheet of paper, she wants them to get up and enter the fray of life. That concept is so cool! It sets my mind ablaze with ideas. I’ll sort them out elsewhere, but perhaps they will make their way to the blog later.
Experiment: 10 minutes to freewrite on my blog before work (desperate…haven’t written lately!)
Here goes:
Hmmmmmm. I wonder what crafts I should do this year?
I have to sit down at that piano and get started with that beginner’s course.
I’m so glad the holidays are over (regarding overeating…I’ve got to throw away the remains of that ice cream in the freezer or I’ll eat it.)
I wonder how Douglas is making out in that airport in Ireland for 42 hours!!!
I wish Debbie’s phone would come in the mail, I’m going through major withdrawal not talking on the phone with her for like three weeks or something!
My Christmas break literally blew by, but it was completely wonderful to spend all that time with our kids! Craig, T, Julie, Layla, Matt, Jenn, Jess, Mark. You are all such fun! And all our extended family, it was so wonderful to spend time together with you all! I love the holidays and getting together with everyone!
Facebook is fun! I like the quick checkups you can do on everyone. It makes it so quick and easy to drop a line. I love that!
I’m excited about doing some house organizing. Only the entry closet is done, but I did clean out cupboards in the kitchen yesterday, throwing out any tempting junk food. Yay! I should’ve tossed the ice cream and hot fudge, but Dave and I took care of the hot fudge last night. No longer a temptation!
I’m excited about seeing the children today. They are sweet. We will have fun.
Tomorrow I have a free day. I always like to have a wide open day. Not sure what I’ll do. Sometimes I want to fit in three days’ worth of activities in one day off. Hmmmmmmm. I’ll have to think about that.
On Sunday we’ll be down to mom and dad’s to watch football and that will be fun. Not the football watching so much as the visiting. I wonder what craft or activity mom and I will do. We’ll have to give that some thought.
Haven’t watch much t.v. in the past two weeks and really don’t miss it. How nice! I’d like to read a new good book. Any suggestions?
Wow! Ten minutes is a pretty long time to keep writing! I’m surprised the alarm didn’t sound yet. I’ll get up to check the time left…BEEP BEEP BEEP
Bye.
It’s 11:22 pm and I feel a little like the Energizer Bunny, my fuel coming from a large square of strawberry pretzel salad that I ate at 10 ish. What was I thinking? I was thinking….”Yummy, yummy, in my tummy!” I only make that salad when company is here or when I can take it somewhere to share. Too scary to have in the house with just Dave and I. Dave’s mom gave me the recipe and around the holidays particularly I want to do things that keep her memory fresh. I just typed up a bunch of the recipes she had given me through the years so that I could put them in the recipe book my sis made for Jessie for Christmas. As we ate our pretzel salad and decorated Jessie’s butter cookies with beautifully colored frosting we were sending hugs and kisses to Grammie and sharing happy memories of the special things she would do for her family during the holidays. Grammie, we have you tucked away in our hearts! xoxo
I am sitting here for a few moments enjoying the relaxing melodies of the Christmas Piano Cd ’tis the season
. It’s soothing and beautiful. I’m savoring it like a piece of chocolate slowly melting in my mouth. In a short while I’ll have to transition to the “Do List” but in these moments it’s all about the Christmas tree dotted with white and red sparkling lights, the quiet hum of the dryer, the tap tap tap of the keyboard, and the strains of violin and piano. The aroma of baking cookies would be a lovely addition, but I’ll settle for the gingerbread candle slowly warming on the kitchen counter.
In these moments I am so thankful. I am thankful to God who knows me best and loves me most, even in spite of myself. I am thankful for my Honey who loves me and makes me smile and sometimes double over in laughter…Dave…it’s off to the mistletoe with you! Let’s go! I am thankful for my parents, they are amazing people. They continue to teach me so much by their examples. I rise up and call them both “Blessed.” I am thankful for Dad B. and Barbara, it’s so cool to have parents that missed your childhood, but embrace you with much love through the adoption of marriage. And a big hug to you, Mom B. xoxo I am thankful for our children, both by birth and by the adoption of marriage. To our children by birth, it is an amazing thing to have children, love them, pour your heart and soul into them (making mistakes along the way) and then watch them blossom and grow into adult people! It’s just amazing! I look at each of you, Craig…Matt…and Jessie and I am so humbled and just plain enchanted by you. You are remarkable, precious, amazing people! I love you with all my heart. To our adoptive children, T…Jenn…and Mark, each of you brings wonderful and new personality, perspective and gifts to our family. Our family is so much more because of you. I love each of you, you are unique and precious gifts to us! I am thankful for two precious little girls, the sound of whose voices and the sight of whose faces flood me with joy. Juliet and Layla, Mema loves you so very much.
Heavenly Father,
Thank you for these and so many more that you have chosen so generously to surround Dave and I with. The people you have placed in our lives are truly the greatest gifts. May the love You so generously pour out on us spill over on each of them, reminding them of how very precious and special they are. Thank you for the unfathomable sacrifice You made in giving Your own precious Son for us. I could never have surrendered any of my children, so I can’t even grasp how You were able to do that. Thank you.
Psalm 118:17 reads “I shall not die, but live, and declare the works and
recount the illustrious
acts of the Lord.”
Webster’s New World Dictionary
defines “illustrious” as follows: distinguished; famous; outstanding
Yesterday a dear friend recounted some of the Lord’s illustrious acts on her behalf and I was so thrilled to exalt Him together with her. My prayer today is that God will open my eyes to see his illustrious acts around me and faithfully recount them.
“The LORD has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy.”
Psalm 126: 3
